Cautiously Optimistic...

Sorry about the extended leave of absence. A lot of things have been happening recently (and I will get to that in a later post) but the most important one was my IUI yesterday. Wish I could say it went well. But alas, something always goes wrong.

I knew something was wrong with this cycle because I was not cramping and let me tell you, injections make you cramp like a big dawg!! Yesterday at my IUI apopintment, my RE walked in and told me that my progesterone number had gone up quite a bit since CD12 (my cycle day 12 visit) but it wasn't quite where she wanted it. She said that I will probably ovulate within the next 24 hours and she wanted to do another IUI this morning (as in back-to-back IUI's). I was crushed. We couldn't do one this morning for so many reasons. B is heading out of town for work and he really couldn't be late this morning. Money is super tight and last but not least, I only have enough money left on my insurance to do one more IUI before I hit my lifetime max of $5K. So I had to tell my RE that another IUI was not an option for us.

The nurse told us to bed last night and this morning and of course, we didn't do that either. I didn't want to bed last night because (1) I honestly don't think B could do it twice in one day and (2) I personally don't feel right adding in all those (excuse my funny language) "messed up" spermie into the pool with the good ones that were washed and inserted for the IUI. I told B that we should do it this morning when the washed ones have had a chance to do a little swimming. Well, he overslept this morning and was running behind for work and since I had the day off, I didn't even hear him leave until he kissed me on the head goodbye. Damn-it, damn-it, damn-it.

On a positive note, when the RE was inserting B's little friends, she said that I was spotting which was a good sign that I was going to ovulate within the next 24 hours. Then she told me that B's boys will live inside me for 24 hours (I thought they live for 3+ days inside you but I guess with the antibodies they put in along with a little boost to make them swim faster, they only last for 24 hours). She also told me that B's count was a little over 30 million. Holy shit!!! That is the highest it has ever been so that is soooo good. It makes me think that all the pills/vitmains I have been force-feeding him over the past several months actually might have worked.

B knew I was feeling down yesterday after the RE visit so he brought me home two surprises when he walked in the door last night....cupcakes and salt and vinegar potato chips!!! YUM!! Those are two of my favorite things, not together of course. It was such a nice surprise because he normally does not surprise me with anything and he is not the most affectionate person. Last night, he was a completely different person and it was just what I needed.

Also, yesterday was my mom's birthday. I think it would be extra special if we actually got a BFP this time, knowing that the baby would have been conceived on my mom's birthday.

So, in a nutshell, I am cautiously optimistic. I will keep you updated...